Any dream will do

Hi fam,

Sorry for the delay on the long anticipated weekly letter (I know you must have all been very disappointed). Our district meeting was rescheduled for Tuesday.
Anyway, what have i got to tell you all this week?....The truth is that this week was quite entertaining in that we managed to tract into several special individuals (i.e. apparently all of the crazy people live in the other sisters' side of the area in which we now work). Let me illustrate:

We contacted an oldish man in front of his house and he kindly invited us in to talk about the gospel. He told us he had had a dream the night before that a tall white gringa and a small "moreñita" (google it) came to teach him at his house. This really isn't all that rare as most Panamanians claim to have dreams that predict the future. We just went with it and sat down on his porch. We asked him if he'd like to listen to us sing a hymn and he said no--that those types of things only really sounded good when there were a bunch of people singing. He also added that he had heard that gringos didn't sing very well in Spanish and that he didn't want us to scare his dog. I was completely amused by this but Hna. Aguero was apparently offended in my behalf because she whipped out her hymn book and said, "Well, hermano, we're going to prove that that's not the case." She then looked at me expectantly as if to say, "Give it your best on this one" and we sang "Te damos Señor nuestras gracias". It was the only time I've sung in front of Panamanians and felt pressure to sound really good. I think I added a little bit of vibrato to some parts just for emphasis. At the end, our investigator nodded his head and said, "well now that was too beautiful for just me to listen to."
In the end, he didn't want to accept what we taught, but at least we convinced him that we could sing. Perhaps some day he will remember that.

On the topic of singing, I was overjoyed by the opportunity to practice with the branch choir this weekend as I got to sing alto for the first time in ages. We ended up singing in sacrament meeting and i have to say, it sounded nice.
I've thought a lot about the ironies of my mission: the little girl who never liked to sing in front of people or even eat fried eggs because she was terrified of cholesterol now lives to sing in front of complete strangers all the time and eats about the most greasy, unhealthy food you could imagine. And did I mention that I've lived with vermin? So I don't want anymore of you giving me the "is this water sanitary?" line any more, got it? :)

The point: I am so thankful for this mission. It hasn't been everything I'd expected but it's been a lot more than what I imagined. And yes, the church is still true.

love you all and happy Easter!

love,
Hna. Brewster

Congratulations, it's a PROVINCE

Hellooooo my dear family!

I sit here in slight shock today for several reasons:
1. I just received in my email a copy of my travel itinerary, informing me that I am in fact going back home in a short 4 MONTHS. Remember when I got my mission call and had to wait 4 months to leave? Yeah. This will go by twice as fast. I'm freaking out a tad.
2. I mentioned to you all that transfers were last week. Well thankfully they granted my wish and kept me here in Santiago with Hna. Aguero, but it came as quite a shock when they took out the other two sisters from Santiago (without informing us beforehand) leaving the entire province to just the two of us. We are now in charge of the entire salvation of Veraguas---like Davis County. It's been quite the experience trying to figure out exactly who lives where according the sisters' area book meanwhile juggling the people we were already teaching in our area. It's making us really analyze our investigators to try to figure out if it's worth devoting so much time to a few of them whom we know may never accept the gospel. (Sounds harsh, I know.)

So that's where we are for now. I have a mere 5 weeks left here in Santiago to do as much good as I can. We have a couple of people who I know have made some great progress (including Princesa Leon--have I mentioned her before?) and we're doing our best to be "bold but not overbearing" about testifying of the truth. I think I initially spoke pretty softly about my beliefs and what I wanted for these people I'm teaching, but I don't know...something about only have 4 months left makes it feel like there's a timer beeping in my head and I've got to save as many people as I can while I have the chance ("DO YOU WANT SALVATION OR NOT? LET'S GET TO THE POINT HERE!"). It's not really that dramatic...but it definitely feels urgent.

Just a quick funny story for you: We were contacting houses last night and we met a man who was unmistakably gringo. His skin was flaming white and he had an Alaska shirt on. Trying to be conversational, I asked, "Oh, are you from Alaska?" To which he replied "no," as if it was a stupid question. I don't remember where he said he was most recently from, but I said, "That's great! I'm actually from Utah." He looked me up and down and said, "Oh, I KNOW you're from Utah...." Smiling, I continued, "So...you've spoken with missionaries before, I take it?" His reply: "Yes. And I think it only fair to tell you that I'm Christian and don't believe in the church of latter day saints." There was just so much irony in that sentence that I couldn't contain a smile. "All right! Thank you for your time, sir," was all I said and we left. As soon as we rounded the corner I just laughed. There was a time when I would've felt angry or offended by something like that, but I've learned to just enjoy moments like that and think to myself, "Someday we'll replay this conversation and you can tell me what you think."

H.A. and I have talked a lot about how our testimonies really are the only things we have that people can't claim to be mistaken. We can teach them the doctrine and they can choose to reject it, but they can't tell us that we don't feel the truth of these things in our hearts. That's why it's our most powerful tool and that's why itneeds constant sharpening.

I hope you're all enjoying the snow and know that I love you. Have a great week!

love,
Hna. Brewster

No, we will not die like dogs, we will fight like lions!

Happy April, family!

I sincerely hope you all enjoyed Conference as much as I did this weekend. We ended up getting to watch it in the Robisons´apartment, so we didn't have to go far. I loved how the broadcast on Saturday showed a nice green springly Utah and then Sunday was SNOWY. Man, I miss the craziness of Utah weather sometimes. But I think I might die in snow. Heck, I'm going to die in air conditioned rooms, let's be honest.

Anywho, I don't know if I could pick a favorite talk from Conference but I like the rest of you definitely feel the need to start contributing to the welfare program...I was feeling pretty guilty about that until I remembered, "Oh right, I'm here saving souls." I think that's a good alternative for now... I also was touched by Elder Scott's talk about his wife though it scared me a little when he told all the young men to "stop wasting time in trivial pursuits" and go get married already. Hey, Elder Scott, MY husband has to wait a little longer...give me some time. Basically, I'm hoping there will still be good single men when I get home :) Save one for me!

This week was just lovely. We had to travel to Panama for training and I had to stay the night in the mission home because of a doctor's appointment I had the next day (don't worry--I'm fine. Eye stuff.) Since we had nothing better to do, President gave us permission to go to the evening session of the temple and for the first time ever, I had the opportunity to be one of the last people in the Celestial Room at the end of the day. Coming out of the temple at night time was probably the most beautiful thing I've seen in Panama thusfar. Hands down my favorite place here.

A young boy got baptized in our branch this weekend and the missionaries basically ran the show. The four of us hermanas sang together and--brace yourself for this, Mom--I played the piano for the hymns everyone sang. Granted they were the hymns made easy, but nevertheless I did it and felt quite proud of myself :) Thank you.
As transfers are in just a couple of days, our zone had a meeting this morning where the Elders all put together a special program for Hna. Ramirez who's going home. Seeing as she's Mexican (but she grew up in Utah) they wrote her a Mariachi medley, but on fake mustaches and three amigos type attire and made her a piñata in her likeness. I recorded the whole thing, don't worry. I was very impressed.
And that is basically all I have to report for now... We're still plugging along and doing what we can to spread some joy around here. Keepin' busy.
Love you all, love the letters and thanks for the prayers.

love,
Hna. Brewster

Ai, yi, yi, yi...canta y no llores

Hello my dear family,

Happy Late: Valentine's Day (finally got all the cards and letters from friends and fam. You are all amazing, thank you!), St. Patrick's Day and Mom's Birthday! It was quite the celebratory week.

I learned a pretty big lesson this week: people never cease to surprise you. We made a decision to focus on finding new investigators to teach because for the past few weeks, all of the people whom we've visited and taught repeatedly with all our heart and soul simply have not made any steps toward progression. It's been a bit of a rough road and it wasn't easy letting these people go after investing so much in helping them better their lives, but in the end we know we need to focus on finding those who truly want to accept the gospel and not just listen to a nice story about Jesus.

We were working in an area called Punta Delgadita throughout this whole week and I have to admit that after several letdowns, I was starting to get a bit discouraged. If there really are people who are being prepared to receive us, where the heck are they?? On Wednesday we tracted into two young sisters, Joanna and Magdieth. We knocked on their door and they invited us in to share with them a bit about our message. Joanna was busy dyeing Magdieth´s hair at the time but she seemed pretty interested in what we had to say. Magdieth sort of stared off into space, so I didn't think we were making any impact on her. We left them a pamphelet and made an appointment to come back the next day to teach them more thoroughly about the restoration and Joanna very happily accepted. The next day happened to be a long, unfruitful one contacting in the streets and when we got to their house, we found Magdieth alone with her little baby boy (Magdieth is a 17'year old single mother) and she told us that Joanna was sick with a headache. Figuring that this young little teenage mom who paid no attention whatsoever the first time couldn't possibly want to listen to us, I quickly asked her if we could come back the next day when Joanna was feeling better. As I started to write the appointment down in my agenda, Magdieth said, "I read your little booklet you left."
me: "You...what?"
Magdieth: "Yeah. And I answered the questions, too."
I didn't know what she was talking about until she pulled out the pamphlet we left and a notebook that answered all the questions that were written in the "additional study" page on the back. Not only had she read it, she'd done the homework--and we didn't even ask her to (which is a bad missionary move). She'd understood it perfectly and was eager to learn more about prophets, joseph smith and the book of mormon. I think I really went into shock for a minute there. We met her pierced, black'haired boyfriend the next day and once again I thought, "Nope. He doesn't want anything." Wrong again. At the end of the lesson (a very good one, I might add) he told us he wanted to read the entire book of mormon--in a week. I don't know if I really believe it yet, but we'll see in the next email I send you all what comes of this...
The point: People surprise you!

Hope you all have a lovely week.

love you!
Hna. Brewster

Going Home

Hello my dear family,

first off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DAD! May the day be full of phone calls from your children who (cough) aren't many miles away and not allowed to use a phone. Enjoy the Backer's cake!
Secondly, I hope Ben's doing all right. I'll definitely be praying for that poor soul who ripped 100 bucks off of him...he'll get what's coming. No worries. I hope you all stay safe and healthy while I'm away. Hold out for 5 more months at least. Please!

Right now I'm experiencing a bit of deja vous because i'm writing to you all from my first area of the mission: Arraijan. As I mentioned in the last letter, they had to take us out of our zone because of the carnival celebrations that are going on in the middle of the country, so that means I've been blessed with an opportunity few missionaries ever get to experience--a chance to go back to where it all began. It's been quite the nostalgic weekend for me and it all started on Thursday night when we got here and dropped our stuff off at my old house. I saw this flashback to a younger, more naive and much whiter Hermana Brewster walking through that door completely stunned at her new life for the next 17 months. I'm so grateful for the things I've learned since then. And I still can't believe it's been a year since I've been here. In these past few days I've been able to reconnect with a lot of the first people I met here in Panama, including many dear friends. it's been unreal.

Our first stop was the chino (a little store) that's on the corner by our house. I had made friends with Luis, the Chinese boy who works their with his family, back when I was here but I didn't know if he'd recognize me. When we walked in the store I smiled at him and said, ¨Do you remember me?'' His face lit up, he smiled and said, ''Hi, Hermana Brewster.'' I talked to him for a few minutes, asking how the past year had gone for him, all the while thinking to myself how funny it was that an American girl and a Chinese boy where standing here having this conversation in Spanish... it was funny to me. I was so happy Luis remembered who I was.

Probably the neatest thing though was when we went to go visit some old investigators I had here, la familia Barria. Ever since they took me out of Arraijain, I've wondered about this little family. They came to church with us once but the missionaries after me stopped teaching them because they didn't progress. We walked by the street where I knew they lived but I didn't see the bright orange house I was familiar with. Instead, there was a pink one in its place. It's customary in Panama to paint houses during the year, so I figured it was the same one but I wasn't entirely sure...until I heard a voice call out from inside, ''It's Hermana Brewster!'' and out came Elias, the little boy I met a year ago, only now he's not so little. His family came out to and they all gave me a hug. I was so touched that they remembered who I was despite the fact that I had only really known them a short time and that was way back when my Spanish was extremely limited. We made an appointment to go back and visit them this week before we leave.

Yesterday being fast sunday, I was able to get up in my old ward and bear my testimony to all of the old ward members and friends I have here. I told them that for me, this was like a preview of the Celestial Kingdom when we'll all be able to meet up again. I felt like I was back at home and on more than one occasion the tears threatened to come gushing out. But I controlled it well, I'm proud to say. I'm just so grateful for this rare opportunity to come back for a bit to my ''home'' in Panama. Just knowing that people remember me here made me feel like my entire time's been worth it.

But Im excited to get back to work in Santiago. Miss them too.

Time's up. love you all! Talk to you next week.

love,
HnaBrewster

My firstborn in the wilderness

Well, everyone, I have some big news: I have a daughter! I´m training my first ¨greenie¨, Hna. Aguero from Costa Rica, and let me just tell you all that I couldn't have been more lucky. She is an absolute doll and I´m not sure who´s training who because I feel like she's helping me remember all the good reasons for which I chose to be a missionary in the first place. And it doesn't hurt a bit that she also happens to be a huge country music fan and shares my affinity for Tim McGraw. This was designed in the heavens. I just know it. She speaks fluent English so we're practicing both languages. I've already got some good stories about this which I'm saving along with many others. I'm convinced that the time's going by so rapidly now that I'll be home in the ¨twinkling of an eye¨ and soon you'll all hear about these crazy adventures.

I think you all were aware of how hard the last transfer was but I've learned that I should never complain about unfavorable circumstances because you never know what the Lord has in store. And you don't receive a witness until after the trial of your faith, if I remember correctly. (Moroni was a smart man.)
I'm not naive enough to think that things are and will remain perfect, but I'm certainly grateful for this shower of blessings to remind me to stick it out through the hard times.

In other news, President is taking everyone out of our zone for the next week because los carnavales (a summer celebration) are about to begin, which means there will be crazy people in the streets trying to soak us with water...and other things. SO, we are being relocated for 1 week and you wouldn't believe where they're sending me: ARRAIJAN, LA DOS MIL--for those of you who don't remember (I'm thinking that's pretty much everyone) that was my very first area of the mission. It's been a dream of mine to go back there since I never got to say good bye to the members and I can't believe that a year later, after being trained there, I'll be DOING the training and revisiting all the people I met back when I had a rather limited Spanish vocabulary. I can finally take pictures, visit old investigators and families and talk to all those who didn't understand my gringo jibberish in my mission youth. I'm so excited :).

We have had some neat experiences this week as far as finding new people to teach goes. Next week, if and when I have the time, I'll tell you about the family I met when we robbed a green mango from their tree. Suffice it to say the Lord works in mysterious ways...

Hope you know how much I love you all and how grateful I am for each of you. Keep being good and we'll talk to you in MARCH.
love,
Hna. Brewster

Could it be, yes it could...somethin's coming', somethin' good

Hi everyone,

Well today is the day of the frustrating keyboard,so ifyou see a few words gluedtogether, don't blameme!

anywho...This past week flew by. Hna. Aguero and I worked like maniacs tracting a new part of our area, tryingto find some promising people to teach. The theme of the week hasbeen "thanks,but no thanks." For whatever reason, this areais just extremely difficult to soften up. I still think we can get a few bites,though. We're working on it.

I don't like mentioning names in my email each week because it's proven to be a curse. So without mentioningnames,let me just say that we have an appointmentwith X tonight and we'retaking one of our recent converts so that she can't throw the whole "You've beenamemberyour whole life,so it's easy for you" bit at us. I pray that things go well but I'lllet you know next week.

In themeantime, President Ward has asked us to help build up our little branchhere. The four ofus sistermissionaries helped out with a primary activity this weekend and it was quite a kick. The president,Hna. Salinas, is very musically talented and is a recent convert of about 8 months. This showed when she taught the kids a new version of "head,shoulders,knees andtoes":

"Head, shoulders, knees and toes
Knees and toes
Knees and toes
Head, shoulders, knees and toes

Let's all praise Je-sus!"

Hallelujah! I also enjoyed it when, after along lesson about followingthe prophet, one of the granddaughters of a different recent convert jumped up and said, "What'sthe pope's name?"

So we're working on it. Little by little, good things shall come to pass. There's at least always something to smile about.

I'm ridiculously excited for Conference this weekend and hope you all are too. It's like missionary Christmas.

I love you all and hope you have a great week!

love,
Hna. Brewster